Hetare 5: Lietuvis!!



During WWII, some soldiers in the American forces got too spirited
upon getting ice cream that they ended up
breaking their bones and had to be shipped home.

And, now that I think of it, it seems that American
battleships were fitted with ice-cream machines.
Doesn’t that sound like somebody else we know?

BTW – during the war, the American soldiers stationed in Britain
seemed to have been smash hits with the local lasses.
Of course, they were cool and cheerful and hunky and all that,
but the thing was—they were rich.

At the time, Britain was virtually broke—townsfolk couldn’t get
their hands on winter stockings, let alone candies.
But here came the American troops who, not suffering greatly from
food or supply shortages, gave whatever they got to the local girls.

Unsurprisingly, they became the next Joe Sexy.

Since it was allegedly pretty easy, there came a parade of American
soldiers who worked soulfully to get girls via chocolate or stockings.
Apparently, an order from the British side to ‘keep your
supplies to yourself and family!’ came out rather fast.

[T/N: Minami-Centrair – an attempted 2005 merger between the Mihama and
Minamichita townships in the Aichi prefecture. Apparently furor after the name
(which was shoehorned in by the town council) caused the merger to stall, though
I don’t know any more details. The name Minami-Centrair came from the nearby airport.]

The country that grew most peevish at Germany and
Russia’s increasingly good relations was Japan.
Declaring that ‘the ways of the West are too inscrutable!’,
the entire Japanese cabinet resigned.

To the “Why did they resign over that!?” Europeans,
however, Japan’s actions were the most inscrutable of all…


Russia and Japan in the Russo-Japanese War.

Although Japan made its name known to the world
by crushing Russia in this conflict,
Japan had fought with everything it had.
In contrast, Russia had only brought out its regional troops
and still had oh so much resources to spare.


Thanks to this quarrel with Russia,
Japan used up five years’ worth of living expenses.
Fight on, Japan, fight.


The favourite war trophy among Russian troops appears to be the common water faucet.
“Awesome! Instantaneous water everywhere!”, indeed.
Long live Russian soldiers! (*´∀`*)

Russia partitioned Poland WAY too often.


Thus spake Mr. Lithuania, who, along with Poland,
had once beaten Germany’s family member to a pulp.


Q : How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb?

A : Three. One to put the lightbulb in,
two to turn whatever the first is standing on.

And thus came the eventually useless
Polish-British Common Defence Pact and the
Franco-Polish Military Alliance.

By the way, Poland at the time was confident that it could
drive Germany out by it self, and planned to totally
do so and, like, go on an offensive to boot~
…or something along the lines.
Poland was awesome. Yes, he was.

■Nagoya-ben (Valley Girl) and Poland■

That’s like, totally unreal!
It’s so so impossible!
Like, seriously! But whatever,
I totally need to pee like right
now. Seriously to the max.


 

Translation: equivalent-t, aphonetie, jammerlea
Original Translated Version | Original

Hetare 4: Pact of Steel 2



Italians have been an inconsistent people since forever. *laughs*
The North and the South never really got on all that well, but if you ask,

“Is there a strength difference because of the regions?”
In the First World War, Italian soldiers were conscripted from all parts of the country and distributed evenly among the army, but after WWI, they started making the units regional.

Still,
THE USELESSNESS NEVER CHANGED.

They really are HETARE!

Pendant

 

 

 

Although Poland and Lithuania used to be one country,
Lithuania was pretty much in the lackey position.
He was confounded by Poland’s many whims, apparently,
like “Speak Polish!” or “Live like me!”.

Poor, poor Lithuania…

 

 

 

 

Though Poland has the image of ‘the poor abused country stuck between Russia and Germany’ he actually has been destroyed many times and yet still rose back like a phoenix. In other words, he seems to actually be a tough, strong country.

Surprisingly, there were times when he’d won against Russia and Germany. The time he was with Lithuania was his golden age, where he and Lithuania the Lackey conquered and expanded across Eastern Europe.

Also, this is pointless, but I based Poland’s accent on Nagoya schoolgirls.

(T/N: In English this would be Valley Girl.)

 

 

 

 

 

 


Russia actually had traumatic memories of Poland and letters before.
In one of their wars, he grew to distrust his allies thanks
to Poland’s fake letters and caused massive unrest in the ranks,
at which point Poland swooped in and took Moscow.

 

He did get a very thorough revenge afterwards, though.

 

Speaking of Russia’s friends, I completely forgot this person.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And so, we have the Pact of Steel.
Although Lithuania said ‘Soviet’ singularly in the last panel,
please think of it as the USSR.



 

Translation: equivalent-t, konkira, hetamushitama, jammerlea
Original Translated Version | Original

Hetare 4: Pact of Steel 1


 

 

 

Lithuania and Russia

After Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin finished their conference at Yalta,
they went on a sightseeing flight to the Black Sea.
No sooner than they’d taken off, a devil jumped onto
the airplane’s wing and started to destroy the engine.
Churchill kept his cool and began to negotiate.

“Sir, if you’ll stop that,
I’ll give you a seat in the House of Lords.”

The devil, however, refused to listen.
A few minutes later, Roosevelt said to the devil,

“Hey, you, yes, you. If you’ll stop,
I’ll give you as much Californian farmland and new Packard cars as you want.”

But the devil continued to destroy the engines.
At this point, Stalin gently shouted,

“Hey, you fuckwad, if you don’t stop that right
now I’ll throw you into the kolkhoz!

At the moment the devil heard those words,
it flew away, never to be seen again.

From the kolkhoz that even the devil fears.

 

Lithuania and the Happy Three Baltic States

Although Lithuania used to be a big country with Poland,
Russia did its best to break that apart—>Lithuania is ‘recruited’.
Afterwards, poor Lithuania’s plight was to be beaten up by Russia day after day.
By the way, Lithuania-kun likes martial arts.
He’s also the (relatively) most cheerful among the Baltic states.

 

 


The Trembling Trio

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 


The Pact of Steel. A treaty exchanged between Germany and Italy
to help each other out if each is ever in a bind.
This pact will change the two Italy’s immeasurably in the future.

 

next⇒
coming soon


 

Translation: equivalent-t, konkira, hetamushitama, jammerlea
Original Translated Version | Original